Hassocks Fatboys are the Leicester City of the Sussex Sunday League

It completed a 12-year journey for the Fatboys, beginning in Division Five back in 2012. Four promotions and two relegations have followed with the only pieces of silverware secured before now being the Division Three title in 2015 and the Sussex Sunday Trophy in 2022.

Having been elevated into the top flight for the current campaign after finishing seventh of 10 teams in the Intermediate Division last season, not even the Fatboys themselves had much hope of making an impression on the top flight.

“When we heard the news that we were going into the Premier, some of us were left miffed and despondent,” said Fatboys full back Nick Davie.

“Two seasons ago, we had been 9-1 down at half time to a team who were now only the fourth or fifth best in the Premier. We are not ones for getting carried away, but we looked doomed.”

Promotion meant the Fatboys found themselves competing against four or five teams full of County League players. In contrast, the only significant County experience Fatboys manager Reece Wickwar calls upon comes from ex-Hassocks quartet Tom Barnes, Jamie Hillwood, Arni Kublickas and Steve Spies.

Barnes, Hillwood and Kublickas last played regularly at County League level in 2016 and are all beginning to push the wrong side of 35. The old warhorse Spies meanwhile is 56-years-old, making him by far and away the most elderly player to ever win the Sussex Sunday League title.

The increase in quality joining the Premier Division ranks was matched by a step up in seriousness. Whereas the Intermediate Division featured your stereotypical Sunday League sides ravaged with hangovers, the Premier is much more professional.

One club even has a Steven Spielberg-style filming setup, featuring numerous cameras to record games. Highlights are then uploaded to YouTube, attracting a worldwide audience of 236 subscribers.

And yet despite the jump in class, the Fatboys managed to navigate their way to the final game of the season losing only once. That set up a showdown against a Woodingdean outfit with an identical record seeking their third successive league title.

Whoever came out on top on a gloriously sunny day at Ringmer’s Caburn Ground would be crowned champions. If the game was drawn, the title would go to AS Crawley.

The Fatboys took the lead with 16 minutes on the clock. 31-goal top scorer Ruari Farrell latched onto a ball over the top from Max Gill, raced into the area and was brough down by an overzealous Woodingdean goalkeeper. Fatboys stalwart Andy Brown duly converted the resulting spot kick.

Four minutes later and the advantage was doubled. The trusty left foot of Luke Vick swung a pinpoint corner to the far post where captain Jordan Walsh was waiting to direct a header down and into the back of the net.

Woodingdean were rocked and even the Fatboys seemed surprised. That surprise turned into genuine shock when the lead become 3-0 on 25 minutes. Farrell shot from distance and when the Woodingdean goalkeeper could only parry, Stuart Brown picked up the pieces to guide into the now-unguarded net.

Three minutes later and Woodingdean had a penalty of their own after a Fatboys handball in the box. The kick was placed straight down the middle. Fatboys goalkeeper Ray Rabbett was diving towards his right corner but brilliantly managed to extend a leg and keep the ball out.

The joy at that moment though was short lived as 120 seconds later, Woodingdean did pull one back. Player-manager Thai Beebee drilled a low effort from outside the box through a crowd of players which left Rabbett with no chance.

Woodingdean came on strong at the end of the first half but the Fatboys defence remained steadfast. Barnes in particular was colossal in helping preservie the two-goal advantage going into the break.

Having weathered that storm, the Fatboys flew out of the traps to move 4-1 ahead within 120 seconds of the restart.

A long Hillwood throw into the box was bizarrely caught one-handed by a Woodingdean defender, giving the Fatboys their second penalty of the game. Brown was calmness personified in repeating the trick from the first half.

Compared to the breakneck opening 50 minutes of football, the game fell into something of a lull until Woodingdean pulled another back on 67. A deep cross into the box found substitute Harvey Gillam at the far post to apply the finish.

Any hopes Woodingdean had of that moment sparking a comeback were snuffed out four minutes later. Adam Rowden showed why he is known as ‘the Kemp Town Iniesta’ with a slicing outside of the boot pass which sent Sam Hatyer scampering clear.

Hayter had been a menace all game down the right flank and he clinically finished one-on-one. There were still 20 minutes to play, but Woodingdean looked deflated. It ended up being unusually comfortable for the Fatboys by the end.

“As Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, this is a day that will live in infamy,” Davie said afterwards. “Some of the football we have played this season has been ethereal and we saved the best until last beating an exceptional Woodingdean team.”

“I always thought my career highlight would be playing 10 minutes in the FA Youth Cup for St Francis Rangers. Never did I dare to dream Hassocks Fatboys would one day be the Leicester City of the Sussex Sunday League.”